Wednesday, March 27, 2013

Victoria's Secret Defends Marketing to Babies

Victoria's Secrets has recently revealed its spring clothing line Bright Young Things, and has received a boatload of controversy from parents, religious leaders, and their possible target audience -- babies.

"Why are they trying to make me look sexy? That isn't right,"stated 5 day old  Nancy MacDonald (pictured left), just before her three hour midday nap.

Victoria's Secret has denied marketing revealing and sexy apparel to tots. "Victoria's Secrets is not sexing up babies. However, our company's mission statement specifically states that we do not discriminate against a woman's age or size. That  is why Bright Young Things comes in micro-sizes for the college age girl who has hormone issues and is the size of a 5 day old," Wendy Hall, Chief Marketing Director for Babies at Victoria's Secrets.

When the staff at The Newest Newsy News looked at the new clothing line, it was clear what message Victoria's Secrets is sending to the pacifier demographic.

Courtesy of 

Nothing but good, old fashioned American undergarments for her.

Parents who support the company do argue that scanty lingerie seems to fly in the face for the need of diapers. "I looooove Bright Young Things, but how does the I Dare You ultra-thin panties supposed to handle a number two? I just don't get it," said an anonymous local exotic dancer and mother of twins.

In the meanwhile, Victoria's Secret has produced this YouTube video and basking in the controversy.

*Yes, this is a fake story. Victoria's Secrets is not marketing to babies in any way. Click on this link for the real story.