Thursday, April 11, 2013

Kevin Bacon Gets Into More Tweet Trouble

Kevin Bacon: Worst secret agent ever?

Kevin Bacon, actor extraordinaire, has been arrested and currently being held in a secret federal location due to a series of tweets that exposed his secret identity as a North Korean spy. This comes on the heals of Mr Bacon's revealing a major plot turn in his TV show 'The Following' before that episode was aired to the overseas audience.

It all started when Mr Bacon retweeted a message he had received from TV executive producer Jodi Gomes concerning the most recent episode. That message was sent worldwide via the messaging service, and ruining  the plot twist. What happened afterwards directly lead to the actor's arrest.

Reportedly, he was at a local Korean bistro and eating spicy noodle soup when he received the direct message from North Korean dictator Kin Jong-un. At first the messages were a friendly back and forth concerning the quality of West Hollywood's spicy noodle soup versus the spicy noodle soup served in the Pyongyang, North Korea's capital. As if this wasn't incriminating enough, Mr Bacon retweeted Kim's message to him, "Noodle soup be damned, send us the United States nuclear missile launch codes!" At which point the actor tweeted to the world a variety of strange numbers and words.

Within minutes he was under arrest and whisked away by authorities. His last words to stunned onlookers were 'My bad.'

An anonymous source in the Pentagon have stated that the strange numbers and words Mr Bacon tweeted were indeed US launch codes. "We have no idea how he got these things. But doesn't he know everyone? And if he doesn't know a guy, then he knows a guy who knows a guy?" anonymous Pentagon source.

Apparently the FBI had been monitoring Mr Bacon's Twitter feed for quite some time. "His career choices have always been a bit suspect," said Special Agent Gingrich. "Thank God  he has no idea how to use social media."

There has been no word from the imprisoned man's lawyer.

*This is a Poe,  a fake story.